At 38, life has just begun for Eddie Collins.

Eddie faced life through the skewed perspective of drug and alcohol addiction for the better part of 18 years, and his life had begun to resemble the wreckage of a particularly bad morning after.

One Christmas Eve, Eddie stood at his ex-wife’s door, cold and hungry, hoping to be offered a spot on the couch.  It was 14 degrees, and as much as Kim wanted to let Eddie in, she knew she couldn’t.  She had finally begun to see that she “wasn’t helping him by helping him.” So she gave him a warm blanket and closed the door. Eddie spent Christmas Eve in his van –- alone.

A few weeks later, three of Eddie’s friends brought him to the Union Gospel Mission. That was January 20, 2007.  Eddie didn’t give himself three days.  He had given up hope in himself and his ability to quit using. The shame and guilt of past failures weighed heavily on him, and he believed the lie that real change was impossible. He had been through rehab before and stayed clean for a little over 90 days.

But this time was different. When asked why, Eddie replied, “Hands down – the Lord – knowing that I can turn to him instead of the dope, and He will bless me if I do.”
Eddie stayed at the Mission for 565 days and completed the five-phase program. He has been clean for almost two years.  He and Kim reconciled and remarried on August 9, 2008 – 19 years to the month after they first met.  Last weekend they attended a marriage conference, and Eddie was struck by the speaker’s question: “What is God going to say about how you cared for His precious jewel, your wife?”

While Eddie has regrets about his treatment of Kim in the past, he is striving to be the husband and father God wants him to be.  He and Kim are parenting together, and being part of his teenage boys’ lives is a big motivator to stay the course.   “Little Eddie,” 17, has started making better choices. Schyler, 15, went on a 25- mile bike trip with his dad and several other men from the Mission.

“This is the person I knew was inside there,” Kim said, “the real Eddie, a man with a kind heart, genuine, giving, loving.” Before, everything he did was disruptive – lying, stealing, going out to buy a new toilet and not coming home for nine days.

That change didn’t just happen, Kim said. “The transformation had to be learned. The Mission has taught him these steps.”

Eddie readily acknowledges that he is not immune to relapse.  While God has lifted the compulsion to use, Eddie knows he will never be far from the desire.  The drugs are “only a thought away,” and he has taken concrete steps to secure that his recovery continues.  He is currently working for the Mission’s maintenance department in an internship position where he has excellent friends and solid accountability.  He avoids past friends and old contacts with one exception – if they enter through the front doors of the sanctuary at his church or the east door of the Men’s Mission looking for help.

Eddie knows the statistics are against him.  Only seven percent of former addicts stay clean for the long haul.  Eddie is praying and working toward being in that seven percent.